antiminke's ancient posts archives

February 27, 2002, 3:26pm. Too sexy for words (listen to the sound file for the full sensual experience).

3:16pm. Bad pun headline of the week award goes to the Age for 'KFC bosses aren't chicken, but they sure are tender', leading a story about KFC managers burnt their feet trying a fire-walking exercise "In all, 11 ambulances responded to the emergency at 1.40pm when the resort reported about 30 people suffering burns to their feet as a result of a fire-walking exercise over the ashes of burnt timber".

2:07pm. What a day. Yesterday I was told my contract wasn't going to be renewed and today would be my last day. Today I was told I have another month, but until I have it in writing, I don't believe it. Meanwhile, I'm sick as a dog and all I want to do it lie in bed and moan.

Anyway, some tidbits: Lygon Street touts to go: "council officers recently launched an undercover operation to try to eradicate touting in the strip that has long irritated local businesses, patrons and tourists". Britney should count herself lucky she doesn't live in Turkey: "Turkey lifts controversial virginity tests". The mistakes of John Howard, part 734,566 of a series of 1,000,000: Governor-General Peter Hollingworth could be barred from the nation's public schools because of his statements on child sexual abuse.

February 26, 2002, 9:15pm. Went to Luxembourg for the weekend. It's a tiny country, about the size of the ACT (if you're Australian) or Greater London (if you're English). It was really beautiful. Photos when I finish the roll.

I came back to spam in my mailbox, from "Patty Walters internet cunsultant". An almost Freudian typo?

Playmate of the month, through the ages.

Soppy Sept 11 poem reveals truth about flying - "I was on four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayer". No wonder you can never get the bulkhead seats, no matter how early you check in - god's taken them all, the omnipotent bastard.

February 22, 2002, 12:42pm. "The former defence minister, Peter Reith, is continuing to defend himself over the "children overboard" affair, saying he had poor mobile telephone reception when he received contradictory advice on the incident." I can imagine it now, "I've got some static, did you say 'propaganda war' or 'panda whore'?"

The most horrific thing about the refugees overboard scandal is obvious if you look at the picture in this article - their faces washed off in the sea! Why hasn't the Australian public demanded an inquiry?

9:13am. It's disappointing, if a woman is married, that she would want to go and see another man like that," she said.

February 21, 2002, 11:06am. According to news.com.au, "STEPHEN BRADBURY, winner of the Olympic 1000 metres short track title after each of his four rivals fell, has qualified for the 1500m semi-finals while sitting on the ice and facing the wrong way."

9:33am. Pentagon plans propaganda war: "United States defence officials are examining the possibility of planting propaganda and even misleading stories in international media as part of George Bush's war on terrorism.", but the 'other good guys' aren't happy. "Washington's Western allies are concerned about a new Pentagon department of propaganda that aims to plant false information in the media of friends of the US as well as its enemies".

If they thought about it, they'd realise it was already happening. I remember thinking that the US wouldn't start bombing when they did because of propaganda information they'd spread around the Western press.

'Gay' site features Melbourne's finest: "The site contains unauthorised images, believed to have been taken in 1999, of students from Melbourne Grammar, Xavier College and Wesley College involved in a variety of activities such as rowing and playing football."

So of course I wanted to see the pictures. A google search for "all photographs are taken in public places" took me straight to http://www.magnatude.com/faq.htm but it looks like a server-side redirect takes you to yahoo.com.

February 20, 2002, 1:15pm. Dubya is doing his best to make John Howard look competent. From the New York Times, "Standing atop a sandbag bunker and protected by bulletproof glass, President Bush peered through binoculars at North Korea Wednesday and bluntly called it ``evil.''".

Direct from Reuters, "The axes that were used to slaughter two U.S. soldiers are in the peace museum," Bush said. "No wonder I think they're evil.".

Is having a museum evil, or calling it a peace museum instead of a war museum the problem? Do we need to explain to him that just because war museums point ouf the folly of war, it doesn't mean that peace museums point out the folly of peace.

In the same article, Bush says, "We must not permit the world's most dangerous regimes to threaten us with the world's most dangerous weapons". So, it's ok when he thinks it about a bunch of foreigners, but not ok when a bunch of foreigners think it about him?

The Opinion Journal, from the Wall Street Journal, has an interesting article about Bush's use of 'evil' and there's also this summary of responses to Bush.

On a lighter note, Reuters says: "Philippine karaoke parlors have been removing "My Way" from play lists because fights frequently broke out -- for unfathomable reasons -- when the song was sung".

11:48am.Nice article on doctype.

9:32am. I knew photos were doubtful, PM admits. This should be the scandal that topples the Howard government, but it probably won't be. It's horrible that John Howard will probably get away with lying to the Australian public to win the election. 11 per cent of respondents to a NewsPoll said they "would have voted differently had they known the truth during the election campaign", and 51 per cent "felt the government had acted 'dishonourably' in the affair".

Defence staff 'were ordered to doctor details on photos'. Makes me proud to be an Australian. I wonder if it's too late to return my passport.

In related news, Labor is finally getting the web, launching a site http://www.truthoverboard.com/.

Hicks sues United States for the same legal rights as American Taliban John Walker Lindh.

Fluffy link: cartoon.

General Dutch phrases, including the all important 'dat hangt er van af' (that depends), 'het kan me niet schelen' (I don't mind) and 'Ik denk het' (I suppose so). And just for me, the 'be understood' section, including 'Ik ben het woord vergeten voor...' (I have forgotten the word for...).

February 18, 2002, 4:45pm. I stumble across a link to the internet anagram server, but can't remember why I wanted it. I can't help but feel my Dutch class is going to go really well tonight, after a tedious day debugging old code.

Did you know that 'Celine Dion alien' is an anagram for 'alien Celine Dion'?

3:05pm. Interesting commentary and background on the ice-skating controversy. I don't know why I care, except that it seems unfair that the Canadians pouted and whinged and were given a big sop. That wouldn't have happened if it was the other way around, and the Russians came second.

10:35am. I saw Tombraider on the weekend, it was only just ok as braindead entertainment. They really bent over backwards to keep to Hollywood's 'female characters can't kill real people' rule, but even that doesn't explain why it was so lacklustre. I also saw Ginger Snaps, which was quite good but much more gruesome than I thought it would be.

It was really weird seeing Noah Taylor playing a Brit with bad teeth. In honour of the fact that it can be difficult to remember which is Noah Taylor and which is Ben Mendelsohn, I'm proposing a new collective noun to describe them: 'Boah'. So the next time you see either one of them in a movie, you can say with confidence, 'look, it's Boah'. Much better than 'it's that guy'.

9:30am. First ever Winter Olympics gold for the Southern Hemisphere.

Canadians whinge and get a shared gold medal in paired figure skating. The NY Times article is as good as any, except for the reporter bias slipped in at the end, minke.com continued facetiously.

Bush Administration Poised to Eliminate Family Planning Funds - 'Family planning foes in the House are urging the Bush administration to defund UNFPA' (United Nations Population Fund).

More hate mail! It's about Celine, of course. You have to wonder why they're so concerned about anyone saying she's an alien.

February 15, 2002, 15:09. Powell, on MTV, urges condom use, Bush supporters angry. According to the article, Bush and 'other administration officials' want to deliver the message that 'abstinence from unmarried sex is the principal weapon against the spread of the deadly human immunodeficiency virus'. I'm stunned that such an ignorant, unrealistic and frankly dangerous belief could be held by the man who would be leader of the free world.

I'm trying to find evidence that the current US government is using humanitarian aid to push its own right-wing anti-abortion goals. A Salon article states that "The U.S. government is already using humanitarian aid as a key tool for achieving its foreign policy objectives." but the examples don't relate specifically to anti-choice policies.

There's also the NY Times on a recent 'backdoor effort to expand legal protections for fetuses and restrict reproductive rights of women', but that relates to internal legislation.

Btw, John Howard is a lying weasel, but you already knew that.

Read The Banality of the Radical but don't fall into the trap of congratulating yourself because you recognise it.

10:25am. NY Times article on wizz-bang features offered by high-end phones still doesn't include sms.

Excellent analysis of the doctored pictures that swept email and newsgroups after September 11.

9:45am.According to popbitch, 'Ryan Adams stopped a gig in Melbourne last week, and had all the lights turned on - because someone in the audience shouted out "sing Summer of 69".'. Go Melbournites! (While I'm ripping off popbitch, you can't this out of your head.)

New hate mail!

A Texas man is facing up to 20 years in prison for shooting his girlfriend because he thought she was about to say "New Jersey".

Some background on the Tampa/refugees.

February 13, 2002, 15:22am. Damn, I mean 3:22pm. I never thought I'd get used to 24 hour time, yet here I am. Anyway, how goddamn cute is the Amsterdam police site? E-cards, a webcam, their own site of photos from the Royal Wedding. (Except the police themselves weren't so cute when they were chasing animal rights protestors from Leidsestraat on Saturday.)

Ace, accessible art site. Check out the custom tours.

February 13, 2002, 10:59am. $NZ337.50 penalty for being an arrogant bastard

NY heroes die saving fat chick: But right next to where the officers' bodies were discovered, the recovery crews found another victim: an obese woman who was still strapped into a rescue chair the officers had apparently been using to try to get her out.

February 12, 2002, 11:17am.PHPDoc - as the name suggests, it's Javadoc for PHP.

Tourism drive drops 'ocker' image, thank god.

February 12, 2002, 9:44am. Dinosaur vomit discovered in quarry

Surely this arrest counts as an un-American activity.

I went down the Carnaval in Eindhoven on Sunday. What an ace day! There are pre-Lent Carnivals all over the southern Netherlands and Belgium (and Rio of course!).

Everyone but me was in costume. Every pub I passed was blasting Dutch music, but they all looked pretty family-friendly. Some photos - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 - but they don't really give you a sense of how crazy cool it was.

WildDays' Rhythmaholics Anonymous at the Catacombs was cool too, ace venue, nice crowd and the music was good, though a bit too laid-back at times.

One page on this site comes up at number 6 if you search for 'clit' on google. If only I could sell that placement, I'd make a fortune.

Gayatri Spivak, celebrity scholar [NY Times link, free sub required].

An English/Dutch/English translation site I haven't seen before.

February 11, 2002, 11:27am. I missed the Opening Ceremony of the Winter Olympics, so this charming moment was brought to my attention via The Age online: "The Iranian team marched out in the parade of nations to be greeted by American broadcaster NBC referring to the competitors as part of President Bush's "axis of evil"."

I was going to avoid mentioning the Olympics, but it's hard to avoid them over here, so here goes. What the hell was with the men's ice hockey team lighting the flame? Is the US so desperate to remember that they've managed to sort-of win a war before? Ra ra ra, they beat the Russians in a hockey game. They still can't find Osama Bin Laden.

February 11, 2002, 9:30am. The Age with a vag shot? Things have changed since I left Melbourne.

I've been doing some of those 'personality tests' to pick up nice things about myself to write on my resume. A lot of the American ones ask what race you are, and that really freaks me out. What does it matter to my results? Or do they use it for agglomerate data? Or is it a completely normal question? (And I thought it was bad they they ask what sex you are, as if that mattered!)

Speaking of race, CNN can't spell Niger.

Maybe the 'race' question isn't so offensive after all - later on in one of the tests, 'Casino Gambling' was included as a possible 'Investing and Money' interest.

February 8, 2002, 16:28pm. MaxiMadness page done. Now I can go drink beer.

February 8, 2002, 12:34pm. Why do Dutch people think it's acceptable to talk about someone in Dutch when they're a) right there and b) understand enough Dutch to know it's happening? My cow-orkers spent half of lunch discussing the fact that I eat fish but not meat (in Dutch, of course). The fact that they have no vegetarian food I could eat instead doesn't bother them, but they probably think that dry bread and cheese is a perfectly fine option for lunch five days a week.

lol! I can't figure out who on earth this is about, but it's a nice story about a trip to Amsterdam if you don't mind MS Comic Sans (which, of course, you do, having enough taste to read this page).

February 8, 2002. US Government applies Geneva Convention to white prisoners. Well, that's not what it says, but it might as well.

You can bet I'll be doing this IQ/salary quiz.

Google has decided overnight that I need google.nl instead of google.com when I type 'google.com'. Gee, thanks, google, I never thought of it that way before!

What I'm working on today: MaxiMadness - a page about the mechandising frenzy that was the wedding of Willem and Maxima.

Leaked Milosevic bugs have a funny side: Mr Clinton "must have hid in the plane toilet" so that [Madeleine Albright] could not overhear [him calling Milosevic]"

I'm thinking of heading to Eindhoven on Sunday to check out the carnival.

Would you apply for this job?

"It is Saturday afternoon and I have just had the worst flight back from Holland (gale force winds made our plane bounce around like Pammy Anderson on a space hopper). Anyway I have returned to this beaut of a job. I need a majorly good IT and Internet guru who wants to be a Manager of a growing dept - u will be resp for supporting the Europa wide E-business team (sounds good dunnit?) U need to very exp in Microsoft Web goodies (IIS, ASP - that sort of thing). Job spec very in depth so call now."

February 7, 2002.The Dutch health minister's surname is Borst, and borst means 'breast'. Tee hee. (reference the story on dodgy nuclear power plant)

Watching tv the other day, I came across Melissa George (of Home and Away fame) on Thieves, telling someone locked out by a password dialog, 'don't worry, I can program in linux'. Thanks god for that, Melissa, though I'm dying to know what that really means.

Hey, the Home and Away site has Alfisms. Sweet! But they lose points for not having a "flamin' kids" soundbite.

February 7, 2002. Dirty dirty evil minds (thanks Faye!_

A postcard I sent to friends in Melbourne (hi Cat and Cheryl!) before Christmas only arrived today.

air guitar championships make it to Australia

[News just in: apparently I have a job for another month, at least.]

cat panic, via b3ta.

February 6, 2002. Woomera 'breaches UN conventions'.

The Vrankrijk squatters are well organised here. Squats tend to last years in Amsterdam, and offer clubs, restaurants and cinemas - underwater amsterdam includes links to settled squats.

Tha Letta Opener of Death wuz practically burnin' a hole in the pocket of my Membaz Only jacket.

Cook my Sock, and from the same source, porn without the people leads to beautiful watery pictures.

It's a while since I checked out fawny. I wish I had earlier for the link to googlewhack cos I'm always accidentally doing it.

February 5, 2002. My tiny camera arrived today, and it doesn't work! The drivers don't work on Win2k (work computer, sue me), and it won't turn on unless you replace the battery.

Blow Chunks.

fictional drain dwellers

February 4, 2002. NYTimes on SuperBow(e)l Extravaganza: you couldn't help noticing that as a scoreboard in the stadium flashed "Freedom!" there was a smaller illuminated sign next to it that read "Bud Light.".

February 4, 2002. Community Aid Abroad report: "The Howard Government's "Pacific solution" on asylum seekers has increased instability in the region and diminished Australia's ability to play a leadership role." Carmen Lawrence is quoted making a valiant effort but it would have meant more if she'd spoken out before the election.

John Howard ignores it, of course.

February 4, 2002. So the (Dutch royal) wedding has been and gone. I had a great day, a bunch of friends came over to watch the golden coach go past, we ate and drank (and slurped vodka jellies). It was a gorgeous day, sunny and warm.

The BBC's coverage is short and sweet. A bunch of (Dutch) articles/photos are linked from De Telegraaf and Het Parool, including this cute dog from this gallery. More: orange people, Dam crowd, Maxi-merchandise. The one thing that's missing is a photo of the ring getting stuck when Willem was putting it on Maxima.

indymedia view of the day (nederlands).

Photos from one of those roaming camera people: (Caroline) Sandra and Vessy, Fraser and his tight orange tshirt and Nikos and Caroline.

Finally saw Asoka this weekend. Hrishitaa Bhatt (who played Devi) is cute, but also looks disturbingly like Alyssa Milano.

The music wasn't that good but it inspired me to go check out http://www.bollywoodmusic.com/.

Speaking of film, I can't wait to see Brotherhood of the Wolf (official site with trailers), (trailers one and two at Apple)./

I always lose this link to css box layouts.

Stan Grant, the Eric Bana of news.

Dutch word of the day - afgrijselijk: dismal, abhorrent, hideous.

February 1, 2002. Storm!

February 1, 2002. Britney's Breasts.

Feminist icon Pamela Anderson: I have a stripper pole in my bedroom. I was thinking that I would just take pole-dancing lessons and go on the road with Kid Rock.

Our binge-drinking Natalie!

At lunch today, the CEO called one of the sales guy (a Surinamese guy) an 'over-sexed monkey' in front of everyone, including a new sales guy.

July 2. I'm almost impressed enough to bother hating him. In Parliament today, John Howard tried to turn the tables on Labor, and suggest that their questioning of the $2mill he allowed for a special taskforce to stir up trouble on the waterfront and force the situation to a head, was unpatriotic.

June 29. The shock of turning 25 has killed most my braincells, and I've also been afk for a while for one reason or another, but today I'm proud to announce that I've obtained leaked copies of One Nation's Policy , and I've put it up on the net for everyone to read [and now I've taken it down cos it was really quite boring and didn't do much to point out how fucked up One Nation is].

And soon: photos from Parliament's Gallery of Famous Insects. However, for the moment I'm still trying to decide between Pauline the Cockroach and Pauline the blood-sucking leech.

Wake up Redneck Nation! Ten seats to One Nation.

June 14. Wake up Redneck Nation! Ten seats to One Nation. This page is now black in an effort to signify my disgust.

Wake up Redneck Nation! Ten seats to One Nation.

June 14. Wake up Redneck Nation! Ten seats to One Nation. This page is now black in an effort to signify my disgust.

June 7 Mmmmm, daytime recoveries. So much fun they should be illegal, and in fact, half the fun of them is. Girls went 'woooooo!' when I took my top off.

June 1. I'm trying to decide whether I should fix my car, or buy the upgrade to Director 6.5. It's a tough decision, but I guess 6.5 doesn't come with the ability to avoid public transport on cold wet nights.

June 1. I'm trying to decide whether I should fix my car, or buy the upgrade to Director 6.5. It's a tough decision, but I guess 6.5 doesn't come with the ability to avoid public transport on cold wet nights.

June 1. I'm trying to decide whether I should fix my car, or buy the upgrade to Director 6.5. It's a tough decision, but I guess 6.5 doesn't come with the ability to avoid public transport on cold wet nights.

May 31. On the way home I noticed that the Sunday Age had 'Ginger leaves the Spice Girls' as its banner.

May 19. Budget Day. Not much I can say. But I did like this quote from the Australian online:

[Some chick] said she would "rather give birth again" than have to look for another childcare centre in the current climate.
The Federal Government's cuts to childcare facilities was "an unspoken policy of keeping women at home", she said. "Why doesn't the Government say 'We have a policy of keeping women at home'? It reduces unemployment and it looks better for our figures."

May 14. Things I hate today:

People who use Java for animations. That's like using every pot and pan in the house to make a toasted cheese sandwich - it takes a lot longer, uses unecessary resources, and the end result is the same. Except, I guess, if you make a toasted cheese sandwich like that, it's not likely to crash someone's browser or computer.

[19/12/96]. It's two days later, and today is 'I hate all the psycho insane people in my life' day. And dumb scubbers who scream inanities like, "But Kelly I *am* a designer" at each other. But I digress - the people I hate include those fond of analysing the motives of others as they relate to themselves - late for an appointment? It's not because you slept in, it's because you have a deeply hidden resentment towards having to be there. Well, suck my clit!! I also hate with an absolute *passion* people who tell me to go to the doctor's for my cough when their logic is, and I quote, "Because the sound of it is irritating me".

I watched BayWatch last night for the first time, and let me tell you, it *sucks* (but in this case I wouldn't want it anywhere near my clit) - apart from the fact that it's just plain badly made, badly acted television, it's regressive to the nth degree - little Pammy swims out after wet victims a lot, but the boys are the ones who save them - if she's lucky Pammy gets to hold onto the victim's finger while the boy rescuer carries the body to the surface. Not to mention the Christian values. And the worst thing is that Pammy's tits aren't even that great - I'd be asking for my money back, and I'd use it to buy some lip-liner that matches my lipstick.

Suck My Clit!

Otherwise known as
Leck meine Klit! Suce-moi mon clito! Succhiami il clitoride! Cucej mi klitoris!

I'm Mia, I hate everything today... otherwise I like death, destruction, huge spontaneous fireballs (especially ones that engulf those I hate), and fluffy pink bunny rabbits.